Ode to the strimmer

I love strimmers aka brushcutters. I bought my first strimmer when I had my market garden in Germany - a demo model Husqvarna: until then I had always associated the brand Husqvarna with sewing machines but the dealer convinced me that it was one of the best brands and this one was special with anti vibration handle so you wouldn't get the numb fingers syndrome which in the end leads to loss of sense of temperature. I loved it, I strimmed many an acre on my market garden in Germany and used it as a weeding machine, harvester and composter all-in-one. My Husqvarna lasted 3 years: until I had some volunteers working on the farm who didn't know that a strimmer has a 2-stroke engine and needs a petrol-oil mixture. So they filled it with straight petrol and the engine seized up: end of my lovely Husqvarna. That was in Holland and I went off to the mechanics (Ramon came along) and we had a choice between a cheap yellow one and a more expensive red one. Ramon wanted the yellow one but I decided on the red one because that was a Honda 4-stroke machine which meant there couldn't ever be a mistake any more in not mixing the oil in because it uses straight petrol. Sadly I sold the business soon afterwards and the Honda strimmer with it. At Emerson I bought a Husqvarna second hand: stupid. Never ever buy a second hand strimmer! If a strimmer is good the owner will use it until it dies, if a strimmer is bad or starts to have problems you sell it on eBay. The Husqvarna had some service on and off but has been composting for the last couple of years in the lorry body. In Brasil we bought a second hand Stihl - and of course Cabaclo got the mixture wrong and off I went in our Volkswagen beatle (lovely but hugely inpractical without a boot - strimmer peeping out through the window while I was making my way to the nearest Stihl repair shop) to get a new cylinder. Back in the UK I thought I had a clever idea and I bought the cheapest strimmer they had in the Homebase and took out the 3 year extended warrenty: I thought that would give as a sort of monthly subscription on new strimmers whenever the thing would die. And so it went: that year we went three times to Homebase for a new strimmer, but unfortunately we were obviously not the only ones whose strimmer died whenever we tried to use it for more than 5 minutes so they were out of stock most of the time. We still have the last specimen lying composting in the lorrybody next to the Husqvarna...
So - but now... I bought a Stihl.... The Rolls Royce among the strimmers. Expensive, made in Germany by real underground blacksmithing dwarfs, put together by Swiss elves with the knowhow of ancient watch makers - a shining example of excellence. So today I took delivery of my new coveted toy and went on strimming all those annoying nettles around my transplants - harbouring the worst mistake God ever created. The strimmer is my new weapon against people's enemy number one: these slimy, grey-black horrible disgusting little buggers, these all-devouring snotty intestines, these rampant jellyfish bogeys: SLUGS
Sometimes I have dreams of strimming my way through a whole avenue of slugs, their entrails splashing and slushing all about and me as the iron-clad hero saving humanity from this worst plague of all eternity...hmmm I like that vision

Anyway - bottom line: buy a strimmer, and if you do: buy a Stihl.

I'm off to Dartmoor for a few days (strimmer in my rucksack) and I wish you all a happy weekend!

Arjen